Darling gran, today I thought of my life as a long winding ribbon. A ribbon of lose stretching across eternity to you. I miss you, with such intensity and longing, it almost kills me every day. You, only you will know how very much I love you. My love for you is written in every bone of my body, flows through my blood and breathing through the mouth of my children. Thank God for the children, they are my oarsmen sailing me painfully through the remainder of my lie without you. Ben is the captain, Hannah the cook, Tim the chaplain and Toby, dear little Toby is the watchman. Me, I sit in the boat and steer them through the swirling rivers to the safety of the riverbank. That's my job and one day it will be done - that day be waiting for I will come to you. Love you always.